Youth Work Jokes :)

I can't claim that any of these are mine, nor can I claim that they are all good, but there are some things here that made me laugh.

http://www.premieryouthwork.com/Past-Issues/2015/September-2015/Youth-work-jokes

The few copies of this magazine that I've come across, and the few articles that I've read have been very good. Enjoy them.

When Mickey Mouse has one ear, the future is bleak

I am convinced that one of the most dangerous things Churches have done in the last fifty years is to segregate people based on their ages. Not that youth shouldn't have some time to themselves. Of course they should. And so should those who are over 60. But a long-term or a deliberate segregation can only be bleak for both the future of that church family and the people in it.

But don't just take my word for it. Listen to Dr Nishioka as he explains why when Mickey Mouse has one ear, the future is bleak.

http://www.youthministryinitiative.org/connectingyouthministrytothechurch/

Long Term Youth Ministry

How long is long enough to be involved in youth ministry? Do you need to step out of youth ministry when you get to a certain stage of life? At a PYV training event last week, we were encouraged to believe that there are a number of stages in youth ministry, and we can survive them all.

Tim Hawkins, a youth leader who has decades of experience, was able to consider the great strengths that leaders in all the stages bring to youth ministry, as well as facing up to the weaknesses that we all have.

Briefly, the five stages can be summarised as:

One of the gang

You are pretty much the same age as some of the youth under your care. This means you understand the culture really well and have plenty of energy. But it also means it can be difficult talking with the parents of teenagers or bringing discipline to the group.

Big Brother / Sister

Now you're a few years older than the youth, so you're probably in your early twenties here. It's a stage of life that you are approachable to teenagers, and you have some extra money and time. You're also working out what your life is going to be, and you might be questioning your role in youth ministry at this stage. 

 

Aunt / Uncle

At this point you are twice the age of some of the youth, and you have more life experience. You should also have a better understanding of faith and Bible by now. You're probably also busy with your own career and family, and if you are still involved in youth ministry, you're likely to be wondering if you're too old. My answer to that is "no". In fact, you're reaching a critical point that's worth pushing through.

Parent

With children of your own, you are able to understand what is happening for the lives of teenagers AND for their parents. This is, is my opinion, the 'golden era' to be involved in youth ministry. If you started at the "One of the Gang" stage, then you now have more than 15 years experience. At this stage you can build a great team of younger leaders to learn from you. I know you're tired, but don't give up!

Grandparent 

At this stage, you are possibly older than some of the parents of the youth involved in your youth ministry. And you might find it difficult to relate to the culture the youth are growing up in. You probably hate their music and wonder why they never put their phones down. That's ok. They're wondering why you listen to talk-back radio and why you don't use snapchat. But at this stage you bring enormous life and faith experience to young people. You are an encouragement to them and to the younger leaders. I would also suggest that if you are at this stage, you want to make sure you're not on your own. You need some younger leaders around you.

Tim Hawkins and Brian Harvey

I am now in my late forties. (Hard to believe, I know, but there it is.) I have been involved in youth ministry in one way or another since I joined the youth group at the Salvation Army in Hawthorn when I was 13. I want whoever reads this to know that long-term youth ministry is not only possible, it is beneficial. It is beneficial both for you and for the youth you work with.

If you are involved in ministry to youth now, I'd like to urge you to reconsider your finishing date. I know that not everyone will still be involved when they are 40 or older, but teenagers need to have some people of this age involved. It could be you.

Grace & Holiness - PYV West Camp 2015

The first of the 2015 PYV Regional Camps has finished today in Halls Gap. From Tuesday to Friday we have enjoyed four sermons from Rev Heath Easton (Drouin Presbyterian) on the theme of "Grace and Holiness". Heath took us to four different areas of the Bible to show that:

• We can only get right with God through faith in Jesus - Colossians 1:21-23
• We're only good enough for God when we're not good enough - Luke 18:9-14
• God wants us to stay connected to Jesus and live a fruitful life - John 15:1-17
• Truly knowing Jesus will be seen in growing more like Jesus - 2 Peter 1:5-11

These messages were Christ centered, practical and, in keeping with Paul's advice to Titus (2:10), attractive.
Our conveners, Jesse and Naomi Crabb, brought together a terrific team of co-ordinators, who then brought together a great team of leaders to make sure things happened and happened well.

Being in Halls Gap meant we had some beautiful places to walk, and a good number of the campers enjoyed a longer walk up one of the many hills during the afternoon. Other activities included some team games, the annual (and unofficial) City Vs Country soccer game - which was won by the Country team, and a bushdance.

We give thanks to God for the way he has used this camp, alongside with the consistent ministry at the local church, to bring young people to faith. We believe that one young man has been converted, and many leaders were greatly encouraged to hear about the solid faith in the lives of teenagers.

God is good, and we had the chance to see this again at the 2015 West Camp.

Haemorrhaging Faith - Transfusing Life

So, we learn that young people are leaving the church. We’re not surprised at this because we see it in our own families and church gatherings. And it breaks our hearts.

We have two options before us. First, we can just ignore the problem and hope it goes away. I think we can probably find enough churches who have done this in past decades and see what the results are. Looking at them will show that ignoring the problem is a pretty dumb idea.

Secondly, we can do something. This means working out what we can do! Dave Overholt, gave us some strong and helpful suggestions. Over-riding all the suggestions is the phrase “Does it work!” I don’t think we should ever be driven by pragmatism in the church. This is a dangerous road. But for young people, we can lay out all the information we want, but the question they will still ask is “Does it work?” The power of testimony shows that people still want to hear from others about whether something worked for them or not.

So, here are some ways we can show that it does work.

·      Family Modelling

·      Personal Experience of God

·      Church Life

·      Thought filled teaching

(For a shorter review of the conference and Dave Overholt’s message, read Kylie Butler’s blog  here:)

1. Family Modelling

It is a great heartache for many parents that we haven’t modelled Christian faith well. It is here that children begin to learn if faith is real, or just something we put on for Sunday. Your children want to be ‘real’. They’re not going to go to church for the sake of appearance – remember the fence-sitters who won’t come to church because that would be hypocritical? These could be your children.

Interestingly, Dave says that it isn’t about family devotions, but more about how we talk and pray around our children. Here are some suggestions for modelling your faith with your family:

a.     Pray first; and pray out loud.

When there is an issue for your family, pray together about it.

When there is something good happening, praise God together.

As parents, pray out loud.

b.     Share your devotions

There is a direct correlation between how much the parents read the Bible and their children being part of the ‘Engaged’ group.

Talk about what you have been reading and learning.

Ask each other ‘what have you learned in the Bible today?’ ‘What did you read in the Bible today?’

c.      Do ministry together

If you’re going out to be involved in ministry, can you take your child with you? Last Sunday night I attended a prayer meeting. My heart leapt when one of the men of the church walked in with his ten year old son. That boy didn’t pray out loud, but he was there while others prayed. It’s a good way to learn.

Worship together. I don’t think you necessarily need to sit together as a family at church – I have rarely sat together with my family. But I do think it is important for you to be at church together. It is important for children to see their parents worshipping. (Maybe sending our children out of the church gathering isn’t as wise as we first thought.)

2. Personal Experience

Can we create a space where young people can experience God? Can we put young people into places where their experience of God is acknowledged? I enjoyed hearing this section of what Dave had to say, but I also need to record this carefully. I know it can be easily misunderstood.

a.     Create Experiential Environments

This isn’t about being manipulative with lights and sound. Instead, it’s about creating space and time where things happen. If I ask the question “How many of you had an experience of God at a retreat or a youth camp?” the response would be high.

Kara Overholt spoke of her youth ministry where they have a ‘prayer rug’, which is nothing more than a rug and some cushions in the corner of the room, but it is a place the kids know they can go and pray, or have a leader pray with them.

b.     Celebrate God Sightings

At least once every six months, ask people to share publicly how they have seen God move in their lives. For me, this used to be a part of public worship. So I grew up normally hearing at least one person talk about how God had done something in their life during the week. I grew up understanding that God moves.

c.      Dip your toe in the Supernatural. (Not my words)

This sounds a little more weird than it actually is. Put simply, it is just asking God “Who should I pray for?”, and then praying for them. It means asking God “What should I say to  . . .?” and if you have a response that cheers up, charges up, or builds up, then share it. If not, then seek further wisdom before sharing it with others.

If you feel a ‘tap’ or a holy nudge to pray for someone, or do something, then do it.

d.     Tackle Dark Nights.

Talk with the youth about what happens when you don’t feel God. Please don’t leave youth with the understanding that they will always feel happy if they are a Christian. This can build a very false understanding. Remember the fence-sitters who felt that the church ‘over promises and under delivers’.

(At this point in the conference, I seem to have got myself a little confused. Dave talked of four solutions, but in my notes I have six. I’m not sure which headings should just be a sub-point, so I’ll present them as six different points.)

3.         Church Life

Encouragement

Our children are growing up in a world where they get a certificate and an award at school for just turning up, or for just doing what is expected of them. In such a world, encouragement can be cheapened. In the church, let’s do a step better.  See Hebrews 3:13 and 10:23-25.

a.     Equip people to function in their talents

How can you allow people, particularly youth, to use their gifts and talents in the body of the church?

We make church a place people want to come when they feel that it is worth coming to. Using your abilities will do this.

b.     Make church a celebrating place.

Celebrate the people that are in your church and their achievements.

Be authentic in the hallways and car park of the church

c.      Use encouragement notes.

Allow youth to write notes of encouragement to each other. Allow adults to write notes to each other.

Older Connections

How important is it for our young people to be connected to older people within the church!! There must be cross-generational relationships within the community of faith.

a.     Youth leaders have a mentor within the church

This might mean asking someone to be a mentor for six months, or twelve months, etc. Putting a time limit on the request might make it easier.

b.     Adopt a Student. If your church is near a university, you can organise for a family to look after one student while he/she is studying. This would mean, for example, inviting them for a meal once a week, doing their washing, etc.

c.      Testimonies from older people.

Use video to bring testimonies from older people into your youth ministry. Have couples come and share their experience of ‘marriages that last’ to your youth. Here’s a great example:

            http://davemiers.com/what-is-love/

Serve in the morning worship

Here’s an interesting thought. Those on stage reflect the kind of people you’re trying to connect with. So, if you say you want to reach youth, but the only people who speak publicly have grey hair and a tie, you’re probably not going to connect.

a.     Youth need to get involved early in their attending

If they learn this early, they will know that this is normal at your church. If you try to get them involved too late, they might assume it’s just a token suggestion to keep them hanging around. If you have a church like we do at Croydon Hills, get them involved in packing up a few chairs.

b.     Have the youth serve morning tea. This is a great and simple way to get young and older talking together. I would also suggest having youth welcoming people to church is a good idea.

c.      Get youth doing significant things in the service

Taking up the offering, reading scripture, sharing a story of a God experience, helping with the sound and music, etc.

4.         Thought Filled Teaching

What does the teaching at your church reveal about Jesus? Think about the topics you teach about, and the topics you don’t teach. What does this tell others about you?

a.     Talk about tough and difficult subjects

-Two books that are helpful on this are:

            “Reason for God”, Tim Chester – issues that confront people

            “Paradoxology”, Krish Kandiah – Scripture that confronts people

b.     Are there restricted beliefs in your church?

Those things that nobody would dare to talk about?

c.      Can you answer the “Why?” questions?

We know that there are some of these questions that cannot be answered well, but are you trying? Are you seeking out the answers for some of these difficult questions? People should not be leaving the church with the “Why do bad things happen to good people?” question not being answered.

d.     Is there dialogue happening in your church?

A time for discussion after the service. (One of our ministers concludes his messages with a time for questions. Not a bad idea.)

Feedback through social media

Maybe even texting questions via SMS during your sermon.

Conclusion

It may be that the church will always lose people, and I understand that. There will always be people who grow up and grow out of the church. But we should never be happy with that. And we should look for a way to make that less normal.

Dave Overholt has presented some ways for us to think about what we can do. Which of these things would you take up at your church?

Have a look at the conference videos here - http://haemorrhagingfaith.org.au/

Haemorrhaging Faith

At the start of March 2015, I attended a conference in Melbourne dealing with the issue of youth and young adults leaving the church. This was reflected in the title of the conference – Haemorrhaging Faith.  It’s a weird name, but fitting. If the title had a part two, it would be “Transfusing Life”.

The basis of the conference was a report from Canada which revealed what we already know – young adults are leaving the church in droves. Dave Overholt, a pastor from Canada, and his daughter Kara were the key presenters at this conference.

What did we learn?

In Canada, 70% of people who have grown up in the church will leave by the time they are 30! And if they haven’t returned by the time they’re 35, they probably won’t return at all. (Evangelical churches are doing better, but still losing at least 30% of their youth.)

The 30% who stay in the church are known as Engagers. Over 90% of them say they have experienced God’s love and answer to prayer. It makes sense then that they stay connected to a place where God is worshipped. Interestingly, but perhaps not surprising, the vast majority – 70% - are female. (So, if you’re looking for a Christian wife, Canada might be the place to go).

Those who have left the church can be divided into three groups – Fence-sitters; Wanderers; and Rejecters.

The Fence-Sitters are the largest group. These are people who have experiences of God in their past, but now find God irrelevant in their lives. They believe that Christianity over promises and under delivers. This means that the church talks about a God who answers prayer and makes things better, but these people haven’t found that God answers all their prayers. Or perhaps we promise a warm welcome to people who visit, but deliver something much colder.

For them, attending church would be hypocritical, so they don’t come. They also believe that the church is out of touch and cannot answer the questions they have. Which should lead us to ask, “What are the questions that you have?” And the only way we can find out those questions is to talk with them.

The next group – the Wanderers – don’t call themselves Christians, but they don’t hate their past. They like what the church does, like feeding the poor, but they don’t believe the teachings of the church. What is your church doing to serve your community? Can this be a link to re-connect these people?

The final group are the Rejecters. As the title suggests, this group have completely rejected everything about Church. Their past might be in the church, but they would want to keep it in the past. Unlike the Fence-sitters and the Wanderers, the people who made up this group have a definite reason for leaving the church. It may be that they prayed for someone to be healed who wasn’t, or they were treated badly in the church, (abused), or that nobody could answer their questions.

We can still connect with these people, and in many ways they are easier to reach than the wanderers. But the important thing for me is to ensure young people have no definite reason to leave the church. Treat them well. Answer their questions. Be their friend. It’s not that hard!!

When do people leave?

The research showed that people often leave the church at times of transition. This is particularly clear when people move from Primary school to Secondary school, then again when the move is from school to University. A change in leadership of a youth ministry is another transition that can mean losing a number of young people. In fact, while at the conference I spoke with one lady who had this experience at her church – when a youth leader left to study full time, all the young men stopped coming to church too.

Can we do anything about this? Yes! If we know that there are times of transition coming up, help to prepare the way. Try to work out how you can build the relationships to keep connected with young people as they enter into high school, and again when they enter into University.

I’ll add a word here of my own thinking – making people leave youth group when they finish high school is, in my mind, a bit dumb.  They are about to go through one of the biggest transitions they have ever experienced by leaving school and connecting with a whole new group of people at Uni or at work. Why not give them at least one group of people they know and can continue to be a part of for another year or two? I think having a youth group of 12-21 year olds is a good thing. In the post-school years, people will begin to either stop attending or will step into a leadership role. They will continue to mature and find their own identity in the church as well. Keeping the invitation to youth group is a way to lessen the impact of this transition.

If you are a youth leader, and you know that you will be leaving that role at some point, what are you doing to prepare the group for that? If you leave and the group collapses, what does that say about your leadership? Please help to prepare the way for someone else to come into that position. And help the youth to be ready for that new person.

If you would like to listen to the presentations, go to haemorrhagingfaith.org.au/

Mobilising Students

Last week I wrote a post after attending the Victorian Youth Ministers Network with Ben and Jason from youthalpha. Here's a bit more of what they had to say:

Mobilising Students

Rather than being the youth leader who goes into High Schools to build up connections with teenagers, Mobilising students to reach their friends. Being convinced that it would be effective where the students are reaching their friends rather than trying to reach the students himself. Better to become a coach to students he knew.

Students from different churches working together at school is a great way to bring and show unity among the churches and youth ministries. This is much better than just planning different events together for the youth groups to meet together.

Empowering people is always a risk, but at least ten years after these blokes have finished at their schools, the prayer groups continue.

Create environments of prayer

A space (time or place) where people can pray and so learn compassion; be confronted by God moving their heart. Learning to pray for others by listening to friends pray for others. If no room is available at the school, find the nearest church and see if you can use a room there before school.

A few students praying can change the climate of the school.

VIPx3 Very Important Prayer for Very Important People for a Very Important Purpose.

Praying for other churches; praying for each other's friends; praying for things that are happening at school. You might hear someone realise, "Oh, God listens to the prayers of fifteen year olds."

Create environments of Dreaming

When you ask kids to dream, they will normally suggest things they see at church and youth group. They can only work with what has been modelled for them. But when they get beyond that, suggestions may come. Here are some examples that were used:

•   Hot chocolate on cold mornings

•   Encouraging notes on mirrors in Girls bathroom

Dreaming happens because/when stories are being shared.

Create environments of Coaching

Succeed and fail well. Encouraging those who have had a go so they know they can go again.

Create environments of Training

How do we train our students? Grab some students and take them with you. (It would have been good to bring some students with me today!)

Ideas for additional training

I.      Spiritual disciplines

II.    Leadership principles

•   Leader is the one who serves the most.

•   Leaders show up

III.  Social Justice and sharing faith

•   Sharing what you are experts at.

Provide Resources

Resources can help remove barriers. Things like the 40 hour famine, Alpha, etc provide a way for us to start a conversation.

Keep your ear to the ground to know what students are connecting to 'now'. It can be a little embarrassing if we refer to something that we think is relevant only to find out nobody watches that tv show anymore.

We can't force students to do something they don't want to do. We can't make them feel like our friendship with them depends on them using a resource we suggest.

What we teach our students

From the Bible.

I.      The message of the gospel

•   Identity and power source comes through Jesus

•   Giving them language to communicate the gospel

II.    What is the Church?

•   Teach that it is people, not a building

•   Model and live that it is a people and not a building

III.  Power of the Holy Spirit