Generation Porn 01

At the PYV Summer Camp at the end of 2014, my wife Anne and I conducted a workshop on the issue of pornography. Why would we do such a workshop at a Christian Camp? If you were to ask that question seriously, I would tell you that you don't know much about Christian youth.

Anyway, I thought I should share some of that workshop more widely. So here it begins.

The twelve points here come from Tim Chester's book "Captured by a better vision" published by IVP. An excellent book that I have referred to before. There is so much more to this book than the twelve points I made use of here, but these were helpful for my workshop.

As this would be enormously long as a blog if I put all twelve points up in one hit, I'll put them up one at a time.

If you would like a pdf copy of the whole thing, click here and you should be able to get it from my dropbox folder.

Here's part 01:

 A few months ago I heard the story of a man who was on a train in another country, and after sitting down he saw a sign opposite him that said “No spitting on the train”. He said afterwards, “As I read that sign I could feel the phlegm rising in the back of my throat.”

It is our hope that you won’t just hear us say “Don’t watch porn!” Instead, we hope to tell you what will likely happen to you if you do and that you will then choose something better.

We’re going to spend some time answering your questions first of all. Then we will give you 12 reasons to give up porn. In this you will see just something of the way that Porn is re-wiring brains of your generation. Finally, we’re going to split up. Anne will talk with the girls and I will talk with the boys.

Here’s a comment I heard again this week that I want you to remember:

“Internet porn is not sex. Internet porn is as different from real sex as today's video games are from checkers.” Gary Wilson – The Great Porn Experiment (5:30)

12 Reasons to give up porn

(Taken from Captured by a Better Vision, Tim Chester, IVP, 2010)

1.             Porn wrecks your view of sex (p21)

The sex in porn is not real sex. It’s not how real people make love.

One porn actress said, “t’s not how it seems on the videos. It’s work, and we have to be in very awkward positions for guys to see the action. It’s not real sex. It’s actually like mechanical sex.”

“In real life, sexually speaking, women are crock pots [or slow cookers] and men are microwaves. But in pornography all a man does is touch a woman and she’s howling in delight. Today, pornography is so widely used by young men, they learn these falsehoods. There’s good evidence that the more porn men watch, the less satisfied they are with their partner’s looks and sexual performance.” Sex therapist Aline Zoldbrod.

Many men are getting their sex education from porn. They is where they are learning – or think they’re learning – what women want and how to ‘perform’ good sex. But it’s a rubbish education! Porn will teach you nothing about good sex. Porn only teaches you to be a porn addict.

“This is not what women enjoy. I know. I was in porn and now I’m married, and I guarantee you that marriage sex is by far, leaps and bounds, much better than porn sex.” Shelley Lumbden (Pink Cross Foundation) https://www.thepinkcross.org/pinkcross-videos/november-2011/two-ex-porn-stars-uncover-truth-about-porn  (14:30)

What does frequent exposure to porn bring?

·      A need to see more bizarre and novel material to stay interested

·      Misperceptions about exaggerated sexual activity in general populace

·      Acceptance of promiscuity as a normal state of interaction

·      Believing superior sexual satisfaction is attainable without affection

·      Finding childrearing an unattractive prospect